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Messages - DiamondHeart

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Suggestions & Comments / Re: Why is Eboka Dying?
« on: August 05, 2017, 08:30:35 PM »
I have wondered that myself. I think a lot of people joined various Facebook groups as they are on FB a lot of the time anyway so they get one stop shopping as it were. I feel like when lalababa left it created a void and from what I can see, Cal has only posted once in the last 20 months - those two were very key members of this forum.

Kudos to you for all the input you've given - I think you've basically been "the voice of experience" for the last couple of years.

I used to be very active but have stopped using Iboga and am not sure if I'll take it again. I don't have anything like the sort of experience you have so I'm not sure I'd be much help to anyone. My focus now is Huachuma (San Pedro cactus) which is a lot cheaper, easier to get and a heck of a lot safer!!! I have had some amazing ceremonies with San Pedro and highly recommend it.

I also felt guilty taking something that was in danger of becoming extinct and I was frustrated that so many addicts were, in my opinion, abusing it.

Eboka Talk / Re: Heart paranoia on iboga
« on: April 12, 2015, 07:52:19 PM »
Well first of all, it would definitely be a good idea to get your heart checked out given that you have a history of palpitations. Even something as basic as a stress test would be a good start and should tell you something about your heart health.

I have had this happen to me numerous times when taking iboga (and the other extreme happened once). The way I handle it is to focus on my breathing - I start taking very slow deep breaths and try to be as mindful as possible of every part of the in breath and out breath and the pause between the two. I also very gently and calmly "talk" to my heart and encourage it (not tell it) to slow down.

« on: March 25, 2015, 05:03:41 PM »
No advertising is allowed on this site. You have been told about this before.

Eboka Journals / Re: Two Floods, Two Very Different Experiences
« on: February 16, 2015, 04:18:21 PM »
What a beautiful and inspiring post - thanks for sharing that with us.

I continue to be amazed by 2 things: 1) the healing power of iboga and the strange & mysterious ways it works 2) the depth of courage and determination that the human spirit is capable of.

Enjoy your new life. You have worked hard for it and deserve it.

General Discussion / Re: Iboga and finding the path in the dark
« on: February 12, 2015, 11:42:50 PM »
for sure - aya is in plentiful supply whereas iboga is not.

I think where you are going "wrong" is you're doing what 99% of the population does - approaching something spiritual with your head instead of your heart.

If you get out of your analytical mind and get out of your own way, the right thing to do will be apparent.

General Discussion / Re: Iboga and finding the path in the dark
« on: February 12, 2015, 12:55:21 AM »

When I said not affordable I meant compared to Aya - which is as cheap as $50-100 for a session and easier to source.

With Iboga, besides the providers like Maria who are charging just around $700, we are generally talking $3000-5000!! Sometimes even more .. rarely less.

Well you're not comparing apples to apples here. It's easy to find someone who will do an Aya ceremony for you - a lot of folks brew their own and take it on their own. That is not possible with a full Iboga flood. You need a responsible sitter and if you don't have one, then yes, people are going to charge you a lot of money to take care of you for 3 days. You can't compare that to a 6 hour aya experience. You're talking about 2 completely different circumstances and experiences.

If you look for obstacles, you will find them. Just sayin'.

Eboka Talk / Re: Introduction along with a couple questions
« on: October 23, 2014, 05:29:12 PM »

Welcome Paradoxical!

I'm sorry, I don't have time to give write as much as I'd like so I hope what I can will do for now.

I'm curious what other places you have researched to do your flood. I really really wouldn't go there given some of your concerns about this not working for you. There are many other good places.

I'm able to pay for Iboga House, but honestly don't even feel like I'm worth it.
The voice you should listen to is the one guiding you towards Iboga, not the one that is telling you that you are not worth it. You are, so this voice is a liar and a coward.

I feel as if it will be best for me to go into this experience with as few expectations as possible, clear intentions, and an attitude of complete surrender.  Yet I'm having a hard time shaking expectations.  I feel as if this is my last shot at being able to figure out this life.  My mind has been a terrible place to live.  I have ups and down.  The downs are much more frequent and unbearable.  I live in a constant stream of negative self talk, conscious and unconscious.  And I can't shake this or figure out how to reprogram it even when I'm doing good.  Good for me is pale in comparison of any normal human being.  I worry that if given a chance to leave the mortal shell, I would choose to go.  I wouldn't call myself suicidal per se, but I've been so tired and felt so hopeless for so long that I've openly welcomed the thought of being reunited with source for quite some time.  I truly worry about all the karmic debts I've accumulated this lifetime.
It's natural to have expectations particularly with your history. Simply acknowledge that you have those expectations but try not to hold onto them tightly. Remind yourself of your true intentions. Iboga is not going to care - the important thing is to be honest with yourself.

Take care!

General Discussion / Re: Natural vs Synthetic: A Philosophical Dilemma
« on: October 10, 2014, 12:56:39 AM »
I think you hit the nail on the head with several of your statements RS.

First of all, I'm a great believer in if you think something is true, then for you , it is. The beauty of what you wrote is that its not just your personal truth. For me what you described is the essence of shamanism.

There are many things that big pharma have tried to create a synthetic version of and not one of them behaves in the body anything close to the original version found in nature - its like trying to put a not quite round peg in a round hole, it looks like it should fit but doesn't.

I love the way Iboga shows you things just as they are without judgement.

Everything matters, even how you treat inanimate objects

Thanks for the reminder - I needed that.

Micro-Dosing / Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« on: September 20, 2014, 07:17:12 PM »
300mg is as good a place to start as any. Pay close attention to whatever effects you experience as it does stack up.

I've never heard of concentrated RB. RB is RB with whatever concentration of iboga alkaloids happens to be present and there is considerable variability in the quality of RB out there. It really does vary from batch to batch even from the same supplier. It's only when you've done an extraction that it can be referred to as concentrated, like TA.

Don't think of it as only working in your sleep, you may have more intense dreams (particularly after a few days of micro dosing) but don't be surprised if you notice something happening in your waking life. Watch how you respond to yourself, other people and different situations. Ask iboga questions. This is harder to do in your sleep.

Micro-Dosing / Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« on: September 19, 2014, 12:13:45 PM »
You will not have the same experience microdosing as you would if you took a flood dose, it won't be like a milder, gentler flood experience.

Your response to the RB will depend on the quality of the RB you get and your sensitivity to it. This is one advantage of microdosing instead of going straight for the flood experience, you get a chance to gauge how your body responds to iboga.

Intention is very important when taking iboga so I would recommend stating that intention each time you take it and anything you can do to support the experience by way of meditation, being out in nature, eating a healthy diet etc will help.

I microdosed while on a 10 day meditation retreat and had some amazing insights and they have lasted. So great things can come out of a microdosing regime.

Hope this helps.

Micro-Dosing / Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« on: September 18, 2014, 01:31:32 PM »

This is such a great thread! Important info being shared here.

I would also give a big thumbs up to doing cactus work. I would love to do a series of cactus ceremonies and then microdose iboga.

It feels kind of weird going so in depth about cactus on an Iboga forum, but........ that's what's happening. : )
That's what I love about these plants though - the synchronicities that occur. I heard about iboga at an aya retreat and the very thought of taking it scared the shit out of me and now I have such an appreciation of what it has taught me. If I hadn't been drawn to take aya, I would never have taken iboga or San Pedro for that matter.

Micro-Dosing / Re: Micro Dose journal
« on: September 18, 2014, 01:05:15 PM »
The first time I took a significant amount of RB, I started with a couple of grams a day (my sensitivity is LOW so take that into account when comparing this to your experience). I probably took about 20g of RB over the course of 5 days ending with about 10g the final night (again, I can handle this without a problem, you may not!)

It was definitely an incredible experience. I remember going for a long walk and not being besieged by my usual mental chatter, no thoughts of the past or future, I was just in the present enjoying every step of the act of walking. I've never felt so free - talk about seeing how life can be without all the baggage we drag into it.

Let us know how it goes for you.

Flooding / Re: preventing sudden death
« on: August 28, 2014, 01:40:05 PM »
Please, please, please take the time to find a sitter. You live in a country where iboga is not a controlled substance. Contact a clinic there and ask them for leads for sitters.

If you read through the iboga experiences forum, you'll find that a lot of people end up saying something along the lines of "I'll never do this again" even with a sitter present. While desperation may cause you to think that the experience can't be worse than how you currently feel, do not listen to that voice - it is not you. The real you is the one searching for the answer.

Take good care.

The Muse / Re: we're all made of gold
« on: August 16, 2014, 11:08:26 AM »
It has the feel of the wisdom & truth that comes from a deep insight. Very inspiring. A good reminder that we are all on an amazing journey , just at different points on that journey.

Thank you, DiamondHeart.

Forgive me, but I still think of Entheo when I see your screen name notwithstanding the fact that you DO indeed have a Diamond Heart.
Nothing to forgive - entheo is still very much alive and well, just trying to grow and transform and the name change helps to reinforce that.

The Muse / Re: we're all made of gold
« on: August 14, 2014, 02:49:00 PM »
very cool lightswitchedon!

Care to elaborate what inspired this?

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