Author Topic: (Long)...Lost  (Read 7296 times)

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Offline lalababa

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #15 on: July 11, 2012, 03:06:05 AM »
Cal,

I have been on here a lot lately, you seem to give this forum much attention and have personally helped me with important questions recently.  I can relate to some of the things you are going through, seems a lot of us are going through some sort of spiritual crisis, or re-birth or both... but don't ever doubt that you aren't helping people every day here, even a "guest" looking at old posts could be being helped tremendously right now.  I for on appreciate you very much, sorry you are down, I am sure it will pass. Kambo-Ibo-Combo *wink*wink

Offline Calaquendi

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #16 on: July 11, 2012, 07:46:48 AM »
Yes  I think it is calling...but man it is going to take big yarbles for me to Kambo again. I'll do it - becuase I feel like it is an important part of whatever is gestating, but damn.

I was up all night with kickass insomnia but I watched the sunrise this morning for the first time in a long while, it was gorgeous. Even in the city - the squirrels were running around - birds everywhere - had a minor epiphany about getting in to the kambo/iboga combo. It will likely happen next week, and if possible I will do kambo on Sunday, the moon should be right.

Again thank you all <3

" I am you and what I see is me..."

Offline lightswitchedon

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #17 on: July 11, 2012, 08:47:23 AM »
my meditator friend told me of a free concert by George Clinton in the city (the host used 'Maggot Brain' by Funkadelic as an icaro which was amazing a few times)

I grew up right down the road from P-Funk's (GC) homestead believe it or not in an obscure small town in Michigan.  You couldn't miss the guy in a small town that's 99% white, 0.05% funk (just George and I).  He no longer stays here, bankruptcy or something.  Years ago, the RHCP actually recorded one of their albums in his home studio.  Anthony Kiedas writes about it in Scar Tissue.

Anyway, Maggot Brain must've been an awesone icaro.

Hope things get better for ya skinny.
« Last Edit: July 11, 2012, 08:49:26 AM by lightswitchedon »

Offline Eon T McKnight

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #18 on: July 11, 2012, 02:26:01 PM »
Try to harmonize with great enmity
and surely there will be a surplus of enmity

How can this be good?

Therefore the sage keeps the ledger,
managing credits and debits
without placing claims on anyone.

Thus the virtuous attend to contracts
while those without virtue collect taxes.

Heaven's Tao plays no favorites,
but always sides with the good.


     Lao Tzu, "Tao Te Ching", 79, trns: Sam Hamill

Dearest Brother Cal, here's a translation of the translation for ya:

Try to harmonize with negativity,
and you will have boat-loads of negativity, shame, remorse, guilt, doubt...

That ain't good.

The Ultimate Sage, Tao, God and Goddess, Great Spirit knows
and tracks good and bad
naturally.

The good do good works,
the bad don't.

Heaven's Tao plays no favorites
but always sides with the good.


Knowing you, i am sure that at some point in your life, you chose to be on the side of the good.  That is evidenced by your good works here on the Forum and in your day-to-day behavior.  You have sided with the good and therefore you are a good man.

You know that, i know that, and all of your other friends here know that, too.

Go with it, let it enfold and embrace you.  You are good, feel good  --  it's a great high!

...yet I am looking for something intrinsically missing, inside Cal. Somewhere I lost a very important connection, maybe even - likely even - belief. Belief in something so important, a raison d'etre - it was ever so close and *poof* here I am blinking in the sun like I just got out of a plane crash.

Heh, i see a cartoon version of you standing next to smouldering wreckage, stars spinning in a circle over your head...

Perhaps you're dazed and confused for one of the reasons i was.  Our society tells us that being a good person is being a boring, uptight chump.  It gives lip service to the good while encouraging us to lie, cheat, steal and kill  --  like a real man.  That we have to be naughty boys and girls to have fun  --  that having fun is naughty.

Fook dat shit!

I doan care what mamma don't allow,
gonna have me fun anyhow ! ! !

I don't care what them misfits say, being good is fun, it feels good.  Since we have scientifically established beyond any reasonable (or unreasonable) doubt that you are indeed good, all ya gotta do is accept it, embrace it and go with it.  Fall in love with Love.

Doncha just hate people who blithely say:  "Just do this" or "Just do that" ? ? ?  I sure do!

That "raison d'etre" you speak of is evolution toward becoming a perfected being.  Toward being a saint, a Jesus, a God.  Toward being fully Enlightened.

A Taoist text tells us there are two ways to nurture that evolution.  One is by doing good deeds and the other is by cultivating our own awareness.  It's really very handy.  If one hits a brick wall in self-cultivation, one can do something good for another being and still keep progressing on the most noble of paths.

The only repercussion i can see is that you might be replaced as president of your local chapter of the International Brotherhood of Slackers.

Ouuuu!  That was mean!  Do a good deed and forgive me?  Please?

Namaste!

ET

Offline Calaquendi

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #19 on: July 12, 2012, 12:09:50 AM »
HAA! Touche brother Eon - brilliantly done, and spot on! I have come to this very conclusion regarding slaking this evening. ;)

I have taken much for granted. And I have a big mouth...I go to a men's group on Wednesday nights - it is an AA meeting here but it is such an amazing experience every time I sit with these guys that I try not to miss it. The real point of any and all these 12 step oriented philosophies is the same as any and all other enlightenment kind of modes: it is a spiritual awakening. I always complained I could not achieve this unless under the influence of a powerful psychoactive plant or chemical, and screamed to 'see the Burning Bush' Yet twice now in a week I have come close to this very thing, un-aided by ANY psychedelic drug, and both times I chickened out and let it fizzle...how's that for a cosmic giggle?

I just did not think it could happen unless I MADE it happen...or at least set the stage. And to some extent this is true, sort of a 'if you build it they will come' idea, but there are other ways of building that I never gave their due.

Something's happening.

You're a gentleman and a scholar, McKnight. so very good to have back home.
" I am you and what I see is me..."

Offline lightswitchedon

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #20 on: July 12, 2012, 12:33:28 AM »
Dear Cal,

I have had some mystical experiences sans substances that many on these forums may question the credibility of.  Calling iboga and aya the pinnacle spiritual experiences is laughable in my opinion.  There have been many mystics throughout history who have melded with the one universal truth without the help of plant medecine.  I am not trying to discredit plant medecine since it certainly has its place in healing, although just from my brief contact with several genuine loving mystics who could do things far beyond shamanstic ritual, my perspective had been changed.  I saw shamans coming to these guys for guidance.  I find it naive that people believe plant medecine to be the highest of the high when there have been human beings who have embodied the universe.

There was a night during which I was having a healing crisis and on my knees admitting that I knew nada and was desperate to please God, or my soul or whatever is higher than this damn ego.  Spontaneuosly, all of my senses heightened, "auras" came into view, and mind reading was not out of the ordinary.  It wasn't me, but rather a higher force working through me.  This has been hit or miss depending on how grounded I was spiritually and all this happened while still on suboxone.  I can't wait to see what the future holds.

Also, I met a guy in South Carolina who studied shamanism in the Amazon for seven years.  Lots of aya and other ceremonies.  He said that he no longer needs that stuff and can go deeper than ever before.  He also confirned that the mystic who had guided me was the real deal and then some.

I feel blessed because I continuously ask for these people to cross into my life and they usually do at the right time.  We all (or most at least) need guidance of some sort to point out the truth living inside of us from moment to moment.

Blessings.
« Last Edit: July 12, 2012, 08:37:55 AM by lightswitchedon »

Iboga Panacea

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #21 on: July 12, 2012, 11:20:30 PM »
To each their own and let live.

Whether someone worships certain plants, an invisible god, a rock, or the moon, ext. or whatever else, the one judging is the one out of place.  Acceptance of ones faith is the only way to be granted the ability to choose.  Otherwise one can never have their right to choose if they are judging someone else's choice of faith.  I think the iroquois constitution has a good outlet. 

Offline Calaquendi

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #22 on: July 13, 2012, 12:13:55 AM »
Thanks for sharing that, lights...came at a time when I needed to hear it. It is comforting to know others have had these experiences also, this is newer territory for me.

All of what I have done has led me here, now. Good, bad, indifferent. All of these substances are sacred and meaningful and have played a huge part in my life. Right now there is something else simmering just under the surface and I want to learn what's going on. I think lol....blessings to you ~Cal
" I am you and what I see is me..."

Offline lightswitchedon

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #23 on: July 13, 2012, 12:20:55 AM »
To each their own and let live.

Whether someone worships certain plants, an invisible god, a rock, or the moon, ext. or whatever else, the one judging is the one out of place.  Acceptance of ones faith is the only way to be granted the ability to choose.  Otherwise one can never have their right to choose if they are judging someone else's choice of faith.  I think the iroquois constitution has a good outlet. 


Sure.....but it is all essentially dogma and in the past having nothing to do with the here and now.  Being alive and present all belief is dead, all language is dead, there is nothing but unity consciousness.  This is a fact.  Looking at a tree and identifying it as a tree is based on your past conditioning.  Actually seeing the "tree" as something alive and gleaming with energy is a much different experience.  Same with religious beliefs vs the actual religious feeling of being one with all.  I am by know means claiming enlightment, however these insights have come.  All religion is dead and I am sorry but that is not a matter of opinion, it is a fact.  It is of the past and therefore dead.  Sorry to raise inflammatory rhetoric, but I feel that is part of my calling. 

Then you have the problem of the worshipper and the worshipped......duality at its finest.

Iboga Panacea

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #24 on: July 13, 2012, 12:38:00 AM »
I disagree with the presentation but at the same time realize doing so in a debate format would digress from the topic at hand.  Now I remember why I didn't read more than one book of Krishnamurti.  I am not attracted to such non dogmatic dogmatic opinions called "facts".  Opinion is one thing, subjective.  Objective must be proven through and through evidence.  For that which you have not gone into any details other than to call an opinion or borrowed from Krishnamurti as a fact. 

Not buying it but I have no problems with you chosen path of non faith faith faith of non faith or whatever you choose for you presence. 

I chant Jah Rastafari and get electrical shockwaves throughout, I pray to the divine mother and get results, I worship the father through Iboga.  I refuse to limit the possibilites of the unknown. 

Offline lightswitchedon

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #25 on: July 13, 2012, 01:10:22 AM »
And hindus chant Jai Jai Shiva Shambho and many other things.  Buddhists chant Om Mani Padme Hum.  The list goes on.  It's cultural conditioning, even when it is a lesser known religion found in small numbers in the US.  Jesus, Yeshoua, Jah, Jehova.  Hindus have visions of Krishna, Christians of Christ, Buddhists of Buddha, Rastafarians of Jah, get it.

By the way, I have read far far far more than J. Krishnamurti.  Meher Baba, Gurdjieff, Peace Pilgrim, Ramana Marharshi, Chuang Tzu.  Never would I be stuck on one of these teachers teachings.

I have gone deep into meditation without chanting anything, no mantras nothing.  Just silence and the OMMMMMMMMM becomes ones being.  Ommmmmm is all one can hear and feel for days after sometimes.

I have no problem with debate/discussion, it is healthy.  It is exploration and we all can grow from it.

Calling aya the divine mother and iboga the father is limiting by the way.  The universe is a bit bigger than these plants.


Offline lightswitchedon

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #26 on: July 13, 2012, 11:16:32 AM »
Also KP, I wanted to let you know that I do appreciate your healing efforts, you are a good person so don't get offended by what I say.  If Iboga is what it takes for you to commune with the highest of the high good for you.  I don't want to criticize you because I know that you have helped many people, myself included.

I just got/get a little heated when it seems like you promote plant medicine as the only way to true spiritual experience.  You and I have both read accounts of individuals who were genuine mystics who have become one the universe.....without the help of the sacred plants. 

Another thing.....if you haven't already read Kahlil Gibran you may find it to be fascinating.  He talks about Christ a lot.  He was one of a kind for sure, a melancholy poet whose work is nothing short of beauty; particularly The Prophet.

I also love Hermann Hesse.  As you already know, Rudolf Steiner is next on the list.

Keep doing what you're doing KP, you are a genuine healer.

Much Love......seriously.

Offline Calaquendi

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #27 on: July 13, 2012, 01:48:52 PM »
Let's reel this back in friends - I am glad to have all of your thoughts and opinions as I seek these out, but we can make other threads for other threads. Thanks...

This one is about me being crazy and self centered so let's stick to that  :o

PS - Lights you have any good links to Kahlil Gibran stuff? I'm short on time - but 'melancholy poet' speaks to me...ty
« Last Edit: July 13, 2012, 01:50:35 PM by Calaquendi »
" I am you and what I see is me..."

Offline lightswitchedon

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #28 on: July 13, 2012, 02:17:50 PM »
No sweat, I am crazy and self-centered as well, I know where you're coming from. 

"Life is difficult.  The sooner we realize this the easier it becomes."
-Scott Peck, The Road Less Traveled

As for Gibran, brilliant beyond measure.  Start at the top links and go down, read it all.  It is fascinating.  I also own the Treasured Writings of Kahlil Gibran.  It is a gem.

http://www.katsandogz.com/gibran.html

I think you will resonate with this and it may even help you tremendously.  I hope you pull through, I am also struggling right now.  Sorry to bring the thread off track.


Offline lightswitchedon

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Re: (Long)...Lost
« Reply #29 on: July 17, 2012, 06:37:36 AM »
Cal,

Is everything alright?  It has been a few days.  Hopefully you are just busy.  Did you check out the Gibran?

I hope you are doing alright.  It is true that after the healing crisis come the grand blessings.  Hang in there man.