Author Topic: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster  (Read 3596 times)

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Offline fritzerman

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Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« on: February 13, 2013, 12:13:08 PM »
Flooded 5 days ago and got good result. Mistakenly tried a little kratom yesterday morning. No benefit at all. Then 6 hours later feeling worse. Managed to drag my ass out of bed this morning and go to mass (Ash Wednesday), ate a good breakfast and have managed one walk. Feel a little better but still blah and kind of jumpy at the same time. I'm thinking about whether a booster is the right move. I have HCL left with some capsuled at one 200mg and the other 300mg. Any thoughts? Thanks.

Offline Tapthesource

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #1 on: February 13, 2013, 01:07:15 PM »
I am in the same boat. I did my flood on december 14th 2012 and I am feeling blah and I am awaiting my hcl from IW and I am thinking about taking 200-400 mg booster....Thoughts?
"Knowledge, intuition and experience combine to guide us in thought and deed..."

Offline fritzerman

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #2 on: February 13, 2013, 01:34:26 PM »
Read your original flood report Tapthesource. WOW. Sounds real familiar to my first flood which I did in a hotel in Newark (I had flown in form the midwest). Especially the "loop" repeating.

Proud to be in the same boat with you. I'm also looking forward to suggestions.


Offline fritzerman

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #3 on: February 13, 2013, 02:28:00 PM »
Went for another half mile walk trying to get some umph. Wish I hadn't done that little bit of kratom--If your thinking of doing it don't, it will set you back. I'm just trying to catch back up.

Offline BlueTiger

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #4 on: February 13, 2013, 03:59:54 PM »
You have to be more descriptive than "feeling blah."  Everyone feels blah at some point.  And those of us who have destroyed our bodies for years, and then undergo Iboga therapy will certainly feel blah post flood while recovering.  Thankfully Iboga brain surgery and the Nori-Ocean that has been activated makes the blah a little more tolerable, and maybe at some point, you may even be humored by it.  Finding the humor in it if at all possible, and marveling at the wonder of the human experience and how our bodies can heal is the type of positive thinking that will only aid in your journey to a better life.  It's part of respecting the process. 

This "blah" feeling, lack of gumption, it is a direct reflection of how a toxic lifestyle (mind and body) leads to a tougher life.......while in recovery from it or regularly in it.

I don't see any harm in a booster dose.  Divvy up those HCL's to 100 mgs if you can.  Just know they may prolong the recovery despite giving you a boost, and maybe more nori-build.
Part of my recovery has been changing the way I perceive the blah.  This may sound far fetched, but it's a major cognitive behavioral paradigm shift that I am experiencing right now. 






Offline fritzerman

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #5 on: February 13, 2013, 04:45:35 PM »
The blah feeling is little energy and no motivation. I have change my diet to a more nutritious one but don't expect that to change things overnight. Trying to repeatedly get up and moving seems to pass the time and is part of my plan to get back in shape. Been walking and doing some light weights along with minor chores. Right now I'm overhauling the bbq grill with new parts that came today. But doing it in shifts. Will get out and drive around or go  to the store for something. Got some of the green goodness Lalababa recommended and its quite good.

I use this forum for support and ideas. I might not be much help to others right now but hope to be in the future. I am determined too improve ad heal my body and mind, but like you said I abused my system with pain pills for years, plus 5 years of suboxone(got off that about 4 years ago). What should I expect. Well, back to the bbq grill.

Offline fritzerman

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #6 on: February 14, 2013, 01:35:30 PM »
You have to be more descriptive than "feeling blah."  Everyone feels blah at some point.  And those of us who have destroyed our bodies for years, and then undergo Iboga therapy will certainly feel blah post flood while recovering.   

Part of my recovery has been changing the way I perceive the blah.  This may sound far fetched, but it's a major cognitive behavioral paradigm shift that I am experiencing right now.

BlueTiger, this advice has helped me turn the corner and adjust my attitude. Just being positive about how much better off I am now compared with before and thankful for the opportunity iboga has provided. I am exploring yoga teachings and plan to use this in my recovery. So many here recommend this it seems. Thanks for the kick in the ass to change my attitude. Its only the first day af making this change but it really seems to help. I have also just tried some kava kava to see if it adds the calmness many claim. At any rate thanks for the help.

p.s. I am holding off on doing a booster for now.
« Last Edit: February 14, 2013, 01:39:30 PM by fritzerman »

Offline fritzerman

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #7 on: February 14, 2013, 01:38:09 PM »
Also, I have come to really enjoy the green goodness Lalalaba recommended. Drinking one 32 oz a day and have it stocked up in the frig. Thanks Lalababa.

Offline lalababa

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #8 on: February 14, 2013, 02:24:57 PM »
OH Great!  Great to hear all of this,  I agree that just changing your attitude makes a huge difference, just notice how you may be smiling a lot more and at things that may have not even made you smile or laugh before, put on some good music and dance!  This has always helped me, good exercise too. 
Yes there is a whole other food group in those green drinks that we usually don't get but our body craves... all of that stuff from the sea... Thank You and I hope your energy starts to come back soon!

Offline BlueTiger

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #9 on: February 14, 2013, 08:25:57 PM »
So happy to hear the re-wiring of your brain in your writing.  Cultivate it! 

I have so much more I can share with you in this regard.  More on that later.....bout to go see Life of Pi in the 3D......i think I am going to accentuate the 3D ;) 

Life is but a dream!

Offline fritzerman

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #10 on: February 14, 2013, 10:37:39 PM »
Lalababa and BlueTiger, Thanks for the help and support. I've never really leaned on anybody or anything in my life. I know now that's really a negative factor in recovery. This change in attitude idea of BT is damn wonderful. Hope like hell I can keep it going. It opens a lot of doors to being productive it seems. At least for today it was. One day at a time.

The change in diet and exercise demand discipline. My wife is like a gourmet chef and she has changed to a health food kick after I mentioned eating healthier. She saw all the Green Goodness i have been drinking and started asking questions---like "did you really drink all that stuff?". Then she tried some and said it really wasnt bad if you didn't smell it first. She has a point. Never the less, I really do quite surprisingly like the stuff. Been downing a bottle a day.

BT, I'm open to ideas/recommendations when your ready.

Thanks you two.

Offline lalababa

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #11 on: February 15, 2013, 12:20:00 AM »
Fritzerman, Thank you for the kind words.  I think the re-learning of thought patterns as Blue Tiger mentioned is key if you work with it, just like with drug addiction, keeping clean, even with the help of Iboga, still requires a re-learning of habits, the same goes with your thought process and patterns in general, with your diet, exercise, who you hang out with etc...   Iboga gives you a chance to do this, take it and run. 

 BT also has some great recipes for some of the greatest green drinks I have ever tasted and easy to make, I suggest you PM him for some of them... The ones with Avocado are my favorite... I drank that much of the green goodness in the beginning, still drink it quite a bit, your body is telling you you need it.  You can always lean on us here, it is good to have these people to share with, I am very grateful I found this forum, when I did.  Keep up with the exercise and healthy eating.  BT may have some other suggestions as he has been building his nori glow for some time.  I know acupuncture, massages and yoga have helped him a great deal as well.
There some good info on the Staying Clean board.

Keep up with what you are doing! :)
lalababa
« Last Edit: February 15, 2013, 01:50:00 AM by lalababa »

Offline fritzerman

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #12 on: February 15, 2013, 02:18:12 AM »
Thanks for the support Lalababa. This "change in attitude" thing is so obvious I feel ridiculous for not attempting it before. God knows I read it hear enough I should have picked up on it.

The "no sleep" thing is kicking in good now. I knew it should be coming but thought it would be sooner. 7 days tomorrow. I have flooded twice before. Its 1:00 AM and I am wide awake. Watching TV and half ass working on a file. Took some melatonin but its not working--or at least not yet. Its not as bothersome and more of a little pester if even that. I can't change it. Well I guess I could. I have a bunch of benzos but am determined not to go there. Anyway, these old movies on TCM are great.

i'll PM BlueTiger as you suggest. My son is coming to town this weekend and is a big "juicer"--. He tried to sell me on these for years but I wouldn't have any part of it. I should have.

Take care my friend.

Offline BlueTiger

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Re: Feeling blah--thinking of doing booster
« Reply #13 on: February 15, 2013, 02:28:26 AM »
I think the re-learning of thought patterns.....your body is telling you you need it.  You can always lean on us here, it is good to have these people to share with, I am very grateful I found this forum, when I did.
There some good info on the Staying Clean board.
Lalababa and BlueTiger, Thanks for the help and support. I've never really leaned on anybody or anything in my life. I know now that's really a negative factor in recovery. This change in attitude idea of BT is damn wonderful. Hope like hell I can keep it going. It opens a lot of doors to being productive it seems.
BT, I'm open to ideas/recommendations when your ready.
Thanks you two.

This is a great example of what Eboka did for me, the kind of support that is so crucial, and that can be so life changing!  I lean on my eboka family much more than they lean on me.  It feels good knowing some of your wonderful, kind, yet still strange faces are out there.  One Love Ebokia!

We are all sharing in this experience that is life, that is now.  We are all connected.  Whether we perceive it or not.  Lala and I had an interesting realization recently that we had the ability to bring out a "Nori-like" glow in each other when we were in the same room sharing about experiences on Iboga and how it has shaped us, influenced us, connected us, fueled us.....this sacrament is the center of so much that I know I cannot even begin to comprehend....which is fine, I don't need to understand it all.     8)    Bottom line, eboka, meeting different people here in different ways, talking to others at any stage who are on the same frequency (pre or post flood maybe), paying it forward, this is cultivation of the glow, or cultivation of the new evolution that is YOU! 

I could write for hours my friends.  One thing at a time I suppose. 

Fritzerman, I will leave you with another 2 suggestions since you asked. 
1.)  You mentioned 'being productive' as something that was good...of course, right?!  Well, I am thinking Noopept is worth checking out....
2.)  You also say you are open to yoga.  Well, yoga can be tough, and you actually should ease back into exercise.  If you wanna continue to possibly step outside you comfort zone, check out the below threads of mine on Sat Nam Mantra Yoga.  You can find tons of you tube videos (there are some good ones on my thread).  This practice, which I still do for 30 minutes a day, let's me be a weekend warrior and snowboard with the best of them, and still stay fit enough for occasional racquetball, with no other real working out.  Plus chanting can tune you into the healing of vibrations that Iboga echoes so loud!!  It heals in several ways that should be illustrated on the thread.  I highly recommend it!  The mantra yoga, as they refer to it, is amazing in many ways, can help cultivate a spiritual connection, i quit smoking during my trials so I really love appreciating my breathe now....I think this is a perfect post flood tool that can be dramatically life changing if done regularly. 

http://eboka.info/index.php?topic=1801.msg15681#msg15681

To all a good night.  I'll check back soon.  PM me if you'd like.