Author Topic: First experience with Ibogaine  (Read 3487 times)

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Offline axl617

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First experience with Ibogaine
« on: August 14, 2013, 12:09:07 AM »
Hi guys. I got my order for TA from IW 3 days ago. I decided to microdose rather than jump into it as I'm very cautious about psychadelics damaging an already fragile mind further.

I took maybe 100mg the night before and felt nothing. I figured I'd just take it and see the subtle benefits. I took 350-500mg, and thought I'd have enough time to attend a dental appointment before I felt off. So I left the house and went on my way. On the train it began to take effect, I was hit hard with this feeling that sortov reminded me of lucy, in terms of thinking becoming abstract. The next 2 hours were hell, I began to feel extremely sick, and started to sweat profusely. Hearing other people have little conversations drove me crazy, the crap people talk about day to day which I usually don't mind. I had to go 'purge' in a public toilet and that was the longest of my life, I think my stomach was dry after that. The nausea came and went, a few minutes of feeling very good and relaxed, then hit with the nausea, this lasted all day.

My thoughts were like that of a high person, no universal truths or anything. Some new perspective opened up that reminded me of aya. I had a strong urge to get some 'business' done and instead of going home to rest I went to uni and sorted out a lot of outstanding issues, in one swoop despite feeling sick as a dog. I just knew if I keep putting things off I will never change, that scared me. I wanted to get busy as possible and not be at home just thinking more and more. I went to the gym and worked out too. Sadly, this motivation died down significantly today, but the idea is still there. I saw new levels to people and whatnot during this. So it was all nice and good. I was completely unable to eat, I ordered a beef curry from a cafeteria and just sat there picking at the food, disgusted by the pieces of animal flesh served like that. I ate a bit to not offend anyone but it was hard to swallow.

I don't think I got any significant reduction in cravings for things, in fact I bought a pack of cigarettes after 3 weeks of abstaining because they soothe me. I didn't feel guilty really. Later at night I got hit with the reminiscent feelings of 'existential angst' and whatnot, severe depression, loss of self that I've been dealing with for a year or so. This time a new fear came in, I started thinking about death for some reason. I never feared it but for some reason I really began to, I thought how one day I will just die, and never wake up. Like sleep forever, and the whole universe as I see it will just cease to exist (my perspective of it). That just gave me strong angst, knowing that everything I know and see is in my head, the people in the other room wouldn't exist to me anymore if I just died there. I also began worrying about how my version of reality might be so whacky or off, given that it's the only one I know... But it went away as it always does. And from there on it was just trail vision and more high thinking.

I still have a bit over 500mg left to play around with, but I don't think I'm that keen to. And I don't think I can go through with a flood dose, I can see this kind of thing destroying me if taken at wrong time etc. Acid already gave me enough angst, I think this is more powerful especially with all the surrounding mysticism.
« Last Edit: August 14, 2013, 12:18:01 AM by axl617 »

Iboga Panacea

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Re: First experience with Ibogaine
« Reply #1 on: August 14, 2013, 10:14:57 AM »
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So I left the house and went on my way.

I feel you have not adequately acknowledged how utterly irresponsible this was.  Downhill from there, what did you expect, not ritual, no protected setting, reaping what you sow due to muddy waters.  No crop can yield in such a harsh setting. 

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I still have a bit over 500mg left to play around with, but I don't think I'm that keen to

It would be good to have it in the hands of someone not playing with it.  I know you used those terms without thinking about it and not on purpose, but the accidental metaphorical truth holds some weight. 

Iboga Panacea

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Re: First experience with Ibogaine
« Reply #2 on: August 14, 2013, 10:22:33 AM »
To me your lack of results are to be primarly attributed to a muffed defunkt set and setting.  For that your decision to go into public is to be indexed with a sharp nail on the etchings of who, what, when and why?  For Iboga had no chance to get you while you were still and waiting.  It couldn't sharpen your axel as you meandered around the unknowing masses.  Such an event could only cause turmoil on the sensitive neophyte leading to damages to the cerebral flow of love light, therefore the repurcussions are addressed in the negative electron to the soul. 

How to: On a bed in the midst of an oasis in the desert with the guardian angels monitoring your every movement.  The absolute stillness only accompanied by the harps of heaven.  Such a setting is not actually possible but to get as close to such stillness is the goal.  You did almost the exact opposite. 

Offline lalababa

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Re: First experience with Ibogaine
« Reply #3 on: August 14, 2013, 12:05:13 PM »
I have to agree with KP here axl,

You don't take 500mg of TA and go out in the world.. I also think that starting off with a booster dose isn't a good idea.  personally, I would have taken another microdose or just go ahead and take a full flood dose instead ( ONLY if you are prepared with a sitter and everything else mentioned on this forum).  If a flood dose isn't making you feel well (and 500mgs isn't a flood dose for most, but a booster)  I usually advise taking a bit more until you get to that calm place and it always seems to work.  I really would only recommend a booster dose for someone who has already done a flood (most likely for detox purposes and is having PAWS)  And yes, Iboga is more powerful than Acid for sure, more powerful, more everything.

lalababa

Offline surfingisfun001

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Re: First experience with Ibogaine
« Reply #4 on: August 14, 2013, 08:33:53 PM »
Wow that's intense.  I am glad you didn't take the whole 3 grams.  This isn't something to play around with.  You need a proper setting, ie.  dark room with a bed in total peace and quiet with someone preferably who knows what they're doing watching you.  You won't be able to walk on your own with a full flood so set and setting is key and DEFINITELY with someone watching you.  It is something that if done properly I believe can yield you much fruit.  Much love. 
« Last Edit: August 14, 2013, 08:48:00 PM by surfingisfun001 »

Iboga Panacea

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Re: First experience with Ibogaine
« Reply #5 on: August 14, 2013, 10:55:01 PM »
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It is something that if done properly I believe can yield you much fruit.  Much love. 

Somehow that got to the essence far easier than I was able to.  Mainly what I was trying to get at is don't gauge that experience at all in terms of how beneficial a flood would/could be.  What you experienced was entirely different.  Mainly the love offering is what I hope you can take away from what we have to say.  I have a tendency to overly defend the plant and be an a-hole to the humans if I feel they did it without reverence, so my apologies.  I hope you can take away with you that we care about your well being. 

Offline zingdoozer

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Re: First experience with Ibogaine
« Reply #6 on: August 15, 2013, 01:05:52 AM »
I think it's all good.

Sure, it was irresponsible and a bit silly (and maybe even disrespectful to the iboga spirit).

However IF you learn the  lessons all is well. Just dont do it again.

I agree with all the advice given here, and would suggest you take it to heed the next time.

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Iboga is a serious drug/plant medicine.

Calculate a 15mg/Kg flood dose. Get an ECG before doing it, and get a sitter.

18 hours fast pre-flood and fruits and fruit juices (not processed, but pure in a blender or juiced).

Give yourself 3-4 days off work or anything like that.

The low mood is to be expected, and is the 'gray day' post iboga that sometimes lasts 3-4 days. The mood lift comes after that. And stays for a few months - if you treat it right i.e. no processed food, and actioning lessons learnt.

The things you noticed are part of the lessons - get stuff done, sort your shit out, animal food and the disgust at some of the human condition.

DO it the right way. There are threads here you can learn from. There is much magic to be had.

But respect, responsibility, and ritual i.e. the 'right' attitude will reap great benefits.

Offline axl617

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Re: First experience with Ibogaine
« Reply #7 on: August 18, 2013, 05:15:15 AM »
Hey guys thanks for the responses. Please keep in mind I wasn't expecting to get any effects from the medicine, the lady at IW told me that I wouldn't feel anything at 500mg but that I would see benefits. I figured it'd be a subtle process, and the healing effects would be all in my brain recovering itself. Overall the experience wasn't THAT overwhelming, I've been to far crazier places in my wild addict days.

I also was a bit put off by the idea of sitting in my high rise apartment room, behind four big concrete walls looking out a dirty old window, I was told I'd be better off around nature. Luckily my city is full of it.

The experience wasn't entirely useless in that I did figure out my plan for the future. I'm not sure how much iboga had to play in all this. I still have faith in its healing powers.

Last few days I've been feeling quite good. I'm getting these weird sensations tho that I'm about to pass out. Like that moment just before you fall asleep, it shoots through my body at random times. I wonder if this is to do with coming off antidepressants however.

Offline zingdoozer

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Re: First experience with Ibogaine
« Reply #8 on: August 22, 2013, 07:56:11 PM »
Great things are working out for you.

One tiny tiny word though - that you might not be getting. I'm sure you probably are (as the spirit is already in you and speaking to you) actually getting it though.

Anyways the tiny tiny word - Respect.

I don't feel it was there before you took it, not during and not after.

Most people (who havent had the plant medicine) would be wondering what the fuck am I on about. Respect? But you have Papa Iboga in you, and I'd like to think he is already showing you the path(s).

Do the next time right (and safely) - that's all we ask. The more caring of us will ask that you action lessons learnt after too.