Author Topic: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder  (Read 5964 times)

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Offline bobsaget

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Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« on: September 15, 2014, 11:12:05 PM »
I currently suffer from depersonalization disorder and I have heard that ibogaine might be able to help. This disorder has kind of sucked the life out of me and I have kind of turned here as a last resort. I'm just wondering if anyone on here has seen or heard of Iboga working for this. If not specifically depersonalization disorder, maybe just for anxiety as fears of certain things are what caused it.

I'm just curious what the doses I should start with, where I should buy, if this is even a good idea, etc.


Thanks in advance for any help.

Offline RhythmSpring

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #1 on: September 16, 2014, 01:12:19 AM »
Bob Saget, is that really you???  8)

How old are you, may I ask? Iboga definitely has the potential to wipe out any mental patterns that are convincing you that you are not aware/don't belong in this world/whatever terrible ideas are associated with your DP. That said, I believe Iboga isn't the only cure for it. If you are young (under 20 in my book), I would recommend a less harsh/volatile experience at first to rid yourself of gross DP before you do something as serious/intense as Iboga. 

Have you ever tried any mescaline-containing cacti? Their effects are in a similar vein as Iboga--masculine, self-empowering, heart opening and mentally cleansing--but they are less dangerous and overwhelming than those of Iboga. I'd suggest this before you make a big plunge into the Depths of Iboga, which can totally be hell for some people.

Mushrooms are also pretty benign, healing, and totally physically safe. Many people have found them to be transforming. Salvia can also be a very insightful exploration of the makeup of your mind--you can get to parse what is consciousness and what is not You in your mind.

Iboga is definitely a last resort kind of thing. It's what people typically take when *all* other options have failed them. Are you at the end of your rope? The other questions to ask yourself if you are ready for Iboga are: Do you have someone you can completely trust that can sit for you for the entirety of the experience (2-3 days)? Do you have about a week of free time to have and process the experience? Do you have a safe, nourishing space to do it in?

So, my main questions for you are: What can you attribute your DP to? What is your experience with other psychedelics?

EDIT: I just noticed that you're asking about microdosing. I personally don't know of anyone who has treated their DP with microdosing, but others please feel free to chime in on this one.
« Last Edit: September 16, 2014, 01:15:23 AM by RhythmSpring »

Offline bobsaget

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #2 on: September 16, 2014, 07:35:45 PM »
Bob Saget, is that really you???  8)

How old are you, may I ask? Iboga definitely has the potential to wipe out any mental patterns that are convincing you that you are not aware/don't belong in this world/whatever terrible ideas are associated with your DP. That said, I believe Iboga isn't the only cure for it. If you are young (under 20 in my book), I would recommend a less harsh/volatile experience at first to rid yourself of gross DP before you do something as serious/intense as Iboga. 

Have you ever tried any mescaline-containing cacti? Their effects are in a similar vein as Iboga--masculine, self-empowering, heart opening and mentally cleansing--but they are less dangerous and overwhelming than those of Iboga. I'd suggest this before you make a big plunge into the Depths of Iboga, which can totally be hell for some people.

Mushrooms are also pretty benign, healing, and totally physically safe. Many people have found them to be transforming. Salvia can also be a very insightful exploration of the makeup of your mind--you can get to parse what is consciousness and what is not You in your mind.

Iboga is definitely a last resort kind of thing. It's what people typically take when *all* other options have failed them. Are you at the end of your rope? The other questions to ask yourself if you are ready for Iboga are: Do you have someone you can completely trust that can sit for you for the entirety of the experience (2-3 days)? Do you have about a week of free time to have and process the experience? Do you have a safe, nourishing space to do it in?

So, my main questions for you are: What can you attribute your DP to? What is your experience with other psychedelics?

EDIT: I just noticed that you're asking about microdosing. I personally don't know of anyone who has treated their DP with microdosing, but others please feel free to chime in on this one.



Of course it's me.  8) What's up RythmSpring? Thanks for the reply. I'm 24 years old. I am definitely at my wits end with this thing. I've been suffering for just bout three years now and am willing to "go all in" at this point.

My DP can mostly be attributed to about 7 long years of stress that Pure-O OCD put on my mind. Mixed with other anxiety issues such as generalized anxiety and social anxiety. Despite this, I somehow managed to live a realitively happy life. The anxiety was there but it wasn't my life. But it did get worse and worse as the years went on. My final year without DP was the most stressful though. Was my final year of college and I was dealing with that, a pretty bad breakup as well as the scarey, irrational thoughts that were shoved into my head nonstop from the anxiety.


Eventually I just woke up one morning and my emotional center essentially shut down. I could no longer feel happiness or any emotion for that fact. I felt dead and that feeling never really left me. I've read your story so you know what I'm talking about. It has slightly improved since I first got it and my anxiety levels have dropped since then due to reading a couple helpful books, but the DP is still there and I still can't feel anything. Can't connect with anyone.. not even my parents. Everyone seems like theyre on a different planet. Even writing this to you right now is a herculean effort for me. Everything I write feels like its wrong due to my disconnection. Writing used to be something I used to be able to do so easily..now it's torture. I think I might be rambling here.

As far as psychedelics, I have tried shrooms before. Once before and once after I got DP. Before it was a very pleasant experience for the most part. I felt a deep sense of calmness despite having pretty severe anxiety at the time. After I got DP, it really didn't even have too much of an effect on me to be honest. I think the DP had such a strong stranglehold on my consciousness and I was so afraid to let go that not even something as strong as shrooms could effect me.


As far as microdosing, I figure I would give it a go. If it goes bad, then it won't go nearly as bad as if I flooded. If it helps, then I can always up the dosage in the future. Either way I should come out of it with a general idea of how iboga will work with me and then I can go from there. So I see this as the best bet. If you have any information on dosgages, places to buy etc that would be extremely helpful. I know you said you haven't heard of people doing microdosing for DP, but I figure the same microdose someone does for opiate withdrawal should work.


Look forward to hearing from you.

Offline RhythmSpring

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #3 on: September 17, 2014, 12:08:40 AM »
Seems like you're going about this in a sensible way. I still would recommend trying a cactus of some sort, like a few feet of San Pedro cactus or something like that. I know what you're saying about emotional disconnection and stuff. Cacti helps me get in touch with my heart, and reality feels real-er after a good experience. But, if Iboga really attracts you, go for it. I use Ibogaworld--they're responsible and reliable. The easiest way to microdose is by buying their powdered rootbark capsules; the second easiest way is to buy one gram of Iboga TA and split it up into 20 doses of 50mg in capsules. The way I microdose is by taking a dose I can just barely feel every other day. Other people take subthreshold (can't feel its effects) steadily every day. Everyone is different.

Offline Poonja

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #4 on: September 17, 2014, 02:01:58 PM »
I have a question regarding depersonalization.  What distinguishes this pathology from transcendence.  It is my understanding that many if not most spiritual disciplines teach one to pursue the understanding that the "I" is not one's body, one's mind, one's thoughts or one's emotions.  The purpose being to enable one to experience the real I/SELF.  How does this differ from depersonalization?  Or is it a mere shift in perspective.

Offline RhythmSpring

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #5 on: September 17, 2014, 02:48:24 PM »
One sucks, the other doesn't.

And in terms of more answering your question, transcendence must happen when we are ready. If it happens to early, we feel disconnected.

First and foremost, we should focus on being here now, living our physical lives presently, rather than transcending our minds to some far off netherland.

I would caution any approach of "trying to make the best of it." The boy knows what he has lost. Now lets help him find it again.

Offline bobsaget

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #6 on: September 17, 2014, 08:19:27 PM »
If you think cacti is my best bet I'll follow you as you seem pretty experienced with the stuff. Can you explain a little more on how I can obtain the cacti, what I should specifically ask for, how to take it, how long the effects will last, how intense it will be, etc. I'm getting pretty interested in this. Sorry for all the questions though. :P


And thanks Rhythm, you're right. Some people try to make the comparison between depersonalization and enlightenment.
I think the guy in this video does a good job at explaining the difference. Depersonalization can be pretty much summed up as enlightenment's evil twin. It's pretty much comparing heaven with hell.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9zIKQCwDXsA

Offline RhythmSpring

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #7 on: September 18, 2014, 01:56:34 AM »
Most mescaline-containing cacti is legal: San Pedro, Peruvian Torch, and Peyote (the rarest) being the three main ones. I'd encourage you to do some of your own research. Some of the vendors advertised on this site might have the cacti. There are many herbal shops online and perhaps even Amazon that carry them. You might even find a San Pedro cactus at your local Home Depot. But yeah, do some research. If you come across a site that you're not sure about, you can go to safeorscam.com and usually it'll clear up any doubts.

Also look up how to take it. There are various techniques written all over the internet on how to prepare these cacti. Or, if you're lucky, like *really* lucky, you'll find out about a peyote ceremony you could go to. Erowid.org (http://www.erowid.org/plants/cacti/) is a good place to start. Also, here: https://www.dmt-nexus.me/forum/default.aspx?g=topics&f=91

Effects last a while--8-10 hours is normal. Cactus is pretty subtle and gentle, so I wouldn't be afraid of going with a high dosage.

It feels kind of weird going so in depth about cactus on an Iboga forum, but........ that's what's happening. : )

Offline DiamondHeart

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #8 on: September 18, 2014, 01:31:32 PM »

This is such a great thread! Important info being shared here.

I would also give a big thumbs up to doing cactus work. I would love to do a series of cactus ceremonies and then microdose iboga.

It feels kind of weird going so in depth about cactus on an Iboga forum, but........ that's what's happening. : )
That's what I love about these plants though - the synchronicities that occur. I heard about iboga at an aya retreat and the very thought of taking it scared the shit out of me and now I have such an appreciation of what it has taught me. If I hadn't been drawn to take aya, I would never have taken iboga or San Pedro for that matter.

Offline bobsaget

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #9 on: September 18, 2014, 09:54:39 PM »
Most mescaline-containing cacti is legal: San Pedro, Peruvian Torch, and Peyote (the rarest) being the three main ones. I'd encourage you to do some of your own research. Some of the vendors advertised on this site might have the cacti. There are many herbal shops online and perhaps even Amazon that carry them. You might even find a San Pedro cactus at your local Home Depot. But yeah, do some research. If you come across a site that you're not sure about, you can go to safeorscam.com and usually it'll clear up any doubts.

Also look up how to take it. There are various techniques written all over the internet on how to prepare these cacti. Or, if you're lucky, like *really* lucky, you'll find out about a peyote ceremony you could go to. Erowid.org (http://www.erowid.org/plants/cacti/) is a good place to start. Also, here: https://www.dmt-nexus.me/forum/default.aspx?g=topics&f=91

Effects last a while--8-10 hours is normal. Cactus is pretty subtle and gentle, so I wouldn't be afraid of going with a high dosage.

It feels kind of weird going so in depth about cactus on an Iboga forum, but........ that's what's happening. : )

Thanks for the info. I was looking up the preparation for the cacti and wow thats a lot of work. Still living with the folks so not sure I could get away with prepping all that in the kitchen. They're not the kind of people who would  be supportive me doing any kind of drugs like this so kind of have to try and keep it on the hush hush. Plus my mind is so exhausted not sure I could even follow the prepping steps.

I'm guessing there really isn't anywhere legally to buy the Cactus its extracted form.

Since Iboga seems the easiest to get in its "ready to go" form for microdosing I may go with that. Do you know if I can somehow ship to the US from ibogaworld? Also, if I were to go on the microdosing regimen for a week, you're saying I wouldnt really feel too much, but it should still help? Like I won't have this deep introspective journey like if I flooded? Or I still will have this journey it just won't be as intense? That's kind of what I'm looking for.

Was also just reading this post some guy with a somewhat similar disorder who had great results low (non-psychoactive doses) of 300 - 1500 mg powdered rootbark over the course of about a week
http://www.psychforums.com/dissociative-identity/topic112969.html


Appreciate your help and patience.  ;)

Offline DiamondHeart

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #10 on: September 19, 2014, 12:13:45 PM »
You will not have the same experience microdosing as you would if you took a flood dose, it won't be like a milder, gentler flood experience.

Your response to the RB will depend on the quality of the RB you get and your sensitivity to it. This is one advantage of microdosing instead of going straight for the flood experience, you get a chance to gauge how your body responds to iboga.

Intention is very important when taking iboga so I would recommend stating that intention each time you take it and anything you can do to support the experience by way of meditation, being out in nature, eating a healthy diet etc will help.

I microdosed while on a 10 day meditation retreat and had some amazing insights and they have lasted. So great things can come out of a microdosing regime.

Hope this helps.

Offline bobsaget

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #11 on: September 19, 2014, 07:24:46 PM »
You will not have the same experience microdosing as you would if you took a flood dose, it won't be like a milder, gentler flood experience.

Your response to the RB will depend on the quality of the RB you get and your sensitivity to it. This is one advantage of microdosing instead of going straight for the flood experience, you get a chance to gauge how your body responds to iboga.

Intention is very important when taking iboga so I would recommend stating that intention each time you take it and anything you can do to support the experience by way of meditation, being out in nature, eating a healthy diet etc will help.

I microdosed while on a 10 day meditation retreat and had some amazing insights and they have lasted. So great things can come out of a microdosing regime.

Hope this helps.


I am probably going to buy 300mg concentrated bark capsules. Do you think this is a good place to start. Maybe take one a day for a week? The woman who I was speaking to who was selling it says that I probably won't have any visions while I'm awake but that I should notice more vivid dreams. Maybe I can make slight progress with my issues while dreaming but I'm not sure. What do you think?

Offline DiamondHeart

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Re: Microdosing for depersonalization disorder
« Reply #12 on: September 20, 2014, 07:17:12 PM »
300mg is as good a place to start as any. Pay close attention to whatever effects you experience as it does stack up.

I've never heard of concentrated RB. RB is RB with whatever concentration of iboga alkaloids happens to be present and there is considerable variability in the quality of RB out there. It really does vary from batch to batch even from the same supplier. It's only when you've done an extraction that it can be referred to as concentrated, like TA.

Don't think of it as only working in your sleep, you may have more intense dreams (particularly after a few days of micro dosing) but don't be surprised if you notice something happening in your waking life. Watch how you respond to yourself, other people and different situations. Ask iboga questions. This is harder to do in your sleep.