Greetings All! The following is from emails to a coupla buddies, hope they don't mind. Been on a new jag lately, this sort of explains it:
Joy, intuition, spontaneity, clarity, satisfaction are polar opposites to fear, worry, fixation, depression, guilt -- right? More or less?
Denial, most certainly, has proved totally worthless in solving problems after scores of failed attempts. So, my latest goal is not to stuff, bury, eliminate or even transform 'hyperactive' 'naughty' emotions. Instead of trying to smother emotions when they misbehave, I seek to balance my emotions and let them breathe. Instead of trying to cleave uncomfortable feelings, I seek to harmonize all my feelings and use them to energize my thoughts and actions.
I seek to use joy to balance fear, spontaneity to cure worry. Clarity lifts depression; guilt is relieved by satisfaction.
'Tis a pity that "Techniques for Handling Emotions" wasn't taught along with Readin', Ritin' & 'Rithmatic. I have spent too much time under the illusion that thoughts can be controlled, emotions can't. While emotions can be theatrically 'manufactured' on the surface, deep-down they rule, nothing to do about it -- I reject that notion.
When all is in balance: peace, joy and clarity reign.
Some tests might be: Am I truly enjoying my emotions? Are they my friends? Are they helpful? Do I associate them with spending Saturday night in jail?
"Easy there, big guy! I know you're angry, and maybe rightly so. Just try to keep it down, I mean come on, the dogs are starting to bark! People are trying to sleep, for chrissakes. I'm not suggesting that you forget about it, just try to get a grip..."
Would Lao Tzu smile? Would Chuang Tzu bust a gut?
As a card-carrying member of the male species, the only emotions I was allowed were anger and lust (AKA aggression and greed). Now that I have torn up my membership card and burned my jock, I am finding that I have lots of feelings. Sometimes they blend together, like colors. Sometimes they modify or cancel each other. And while a particular train of thought can/will engender specific emotions, emotions also lead to predictable patterns of thought.
So, when 'depressed', I have patterns of thought that are pessimistic and fixated on obstacles, plus my body/gut feels heavy, weak and lethargic. The thought patterns and feelings evoke and support one another -- my own personal co-dependents. To alleviate depression effectively, I need to address both thoughts and feelings.
This is something no real man should ever have to do! (hehe)
While I could relate to Taoist/Buddhist mindfulness and control my rational/verbal thought processes, I had never applied such techniques to my feelings. Hence, my emotions were free to intrude and run wild. Recently, I have applied those techniques to my emotions, and HOLY COW, the same techniques work on them, too.
It is best, for both thoughts and emotions, to apply control ASAP, before they have a chance to gain 'momentum'. By hitting the brakes as soon as anxiety is observed, a state of panic is never reached. By halting thoughts of gloom and doom, feelings of depression are avoided.
Nothing wrong with controlling thoughts and emotions. I ignore them at my own risk. Let them run wild and they control me.
So, what is it? Am I crazy or just nuts? ~ET
